Conversation #6: Turning a childhood vision into reality

If you feel stuck in your current situation, get off your butt and MOVE!  It takes effort.  You can choose to sit in front of the TV or choose to take action."  —Laura Stack, President, The Productivity Pro, Inc. 

You can say that Laura Stack has been living her passion all her life.  As a young girl, she dreamt of becoming a professional performer.  Laura was always dancing, singing, producing puppet shows, and recording herself "onstage".  She was forever exploring creative endeavors. 

While most young girls are focused on going to the mall or to a concert to watch their favorite group, at age 14 Laura found herself attending a Zig Ziglar Seminar. 

"My mother sent me to a Zig Ziglar Seminar when I was 14 years old", says Laura.  I decided then that I wanted to be like Zig Ziglar—I wanted to be a professional speaker."

Who knew it at the time that this young girl with a passion for performing would grow up to become Founder and President of a highly regarded training firm, bestselling author of four books, and one of the leading experts in the field of employee productivity and workplace issues, featured nationally on the CBS Early Show, CNN, the New York Times, and USA Today.

It's rare for someone to go to the business of professional speaking.  Professional speaking usually comes to someone after years of professional experience, after authoring a book, or to someone suddenly thrown into the spotlight due to a certain event or circumstance.  But this was not the case for Laura.  At that ripe age of 14, she knew this was her path and she went for it.  "I knew public speaking was perfect for me. It combined my passion for wanting to help people with my love of the stage", explains Laura. 

So how did she do it?  How did she turn her childhood vision into reality?

Education was always important in her family.  Her mother held a Master's degree; her father a Ph.D.  It was never a question that Laura and her two brothers would go to college. It was expected. 

"I grew up understanding the importance of education and the motto work before play," states Laura,  “This was the norm in our family".

It must have been a combination of Laura's upbringing and her natural talent for getting things done quickly and efficiently that led her to earning her MBA at age 21.  During this time, she worked for a large aerospace company and eventually became one of their internal trainers.  After working for just two years in that role, Laura realized the corporate world was not for her.

She also tried her hand teaching undergraduate students only to realize the academic world was not for her. 

"I was young, fearless, and able to quickly determine if a position suited me.  When it wasn't a good fit, when it wasn't aligned with my vision of myself, I quickly moved on to something else," states Laura.  This style of career exploration suited Laura well and led her to a position that felt like a good fit.

Laura approached Career Track, a company that produced public seminars.  Although she was young, it never occurred to her that they would not take her on as a seminar speaker.  "I had confidence in myself, worked hard, and was determined," Laura explains.  She submitted a video of herself "onstage". They could see her potential. They liked her energy, and gave her a chance.

Being a seminar speaker solidified Laura's vision of herself as a professional speaker.  "When I was onstage speaking to large audiences, it felt right. I felt in alignment", states Laura.

While continuing her contract work for Career Track, Laura began building her professional speaking/training business. 

Laura had confidence in her abilities; knew her value and what she had to offer.  This enabled her to pick up the phone and cold call companies about her speaking programs.  She offered her programs for free for the first few years to get her foot in the door.  She would go in, wow her audiences, get a referral letter, and quickly move on to the next speaking opportunity.  Before long, companies were calling Laura to speak; and the momentum continued, leading to more and bigger speaking engagements, books, and television appearances.

For many, the thought of picking up the phone and cold calling companies is quite intimidating.

"I had done my work, I was prepared" states Laura.  "I projected confidence in my voice and knew what I had to offer".  “So many people don't do the work and that makes all the difference.  You must do the work.  My confidence came from doing the work."

Are you confident with what you are bringing to the table?  Have you done your work?

Laura was also determined.  She was not afraid of rejection.  When a company said no, she quickly moved on to the next call. 

"When a company said no, I was more determined because I knew if I kept going I would be one step closer to yes" says Laura.

Do you feel in alignment with what you are currently doing?  Do you have a vision of yourself?  Maybe you have been working your vision on the side?  You may be coming from a place where you don’t have the liberty to move from a job that is not suited for you, however according to Laura there comes a point where you must jump.  She's not suggesting being foolish but she is suggesting that you MOVE. 

"If you feel stuck- not in alignment with your vision of you- then MOVE!  Get off your butt and network, get involved in associations or clubs, make an effort" says Laura.  "Some people wallow in self-pity but yet they can't tell me a single thing they've done to change their behavior.  It takes effort."

Laura turned her childhood vision of herself into reality because she was prepared. She did the work. She was not afraid of rejection.  She was determined and she MOVED!  And she continues to move toward new goals— like serving as the 2011-2012 President of the National Speakers Association, writing more books, and of course continuing her love of performing on stage as a professional speaker.  Her momentum continues!

Laura makes it sound so simple.  And you know what?  Maybe it is......Get off your butt and MOVE!  It's up to you.   

To see Laura in action “onstage” check out her great video clips at http://www.theproductivitypro.com/

Where were you last July 4th?

As July 4th falls upon us, I find myself reflecting on where I was last year at this time— I don't mean literally speaking.  Of course I remember where I was physically— I went to a local arts festival with a friend of mine.  But what I am really reflecting on is where I was figuratively speaking— where was I on my life's path.  My path to...well I don't know where exactly yet but get what I'm saying?

It's funny how certain events make us reflect upon a year gone by and what we've done or didn't do— I always reflect on my birthday, Christmas, and I guess now on July 4th too.

Last year at this time I was at an arts festival with my friend and then we stopped for dinner.  I was telling her how ready I was to find my next steps in life and maybe if I started speaking with other women- and blogging about it- I would discover something more about myself or learn something from their path to success and maybe my blog would encourage other women to push forward toward their goals— or maybe to even make a goal.  It was just a thought then.

Well a year has passed and I woke up today with the strange thought that I am actually doing the very thing I was talking about a year ago.  Of course in my mind it's not moving fast enough but reflecting back a year ago, I am one step closer toward..... well what I don't know.  But at least I have started down some path.

Where were you last July 4th?  What goal or vision were you talking about?  Have you done anything this past year to bring you closer to reaching your goal?  If you answered yes, that is great!  Keep moving forward so you can look back next year at this time and see how far you've come.  If you answered no then what are you waiting for?  If you don't get moving toward your goal then you will be looking back next July 4th realizing you are in the same position as you are right now.  Get moving!

I had a great conversation this week with a very inspiring, accomplished woman— and wow did she have a lot of wisdom to share! I can't wait to share it with you.  Check back tomorrow as I will post Conversation #6. 

Happy July 4th.  Get moving!

Reassessing is not giving up

With just five conversations completed, I have learned a great deal.

I had been thinking about this project for quite a long time before actually starting.  And when I finally started, it felt empowering.  I was so caught up in that feeling that I didn't take the time to contemplate what 500 conversations actually entailed.  It just sounded like a good number to me so that's what I declared.  I would interview 500 women uncovering their paths to success.

I learned from Conversation #2 with Moe Keller, former Colorado State Senator, that she took calculated risks on her path toward success.  She always gaged what she was going to take on and in turn, took the steps she felt she could do.  There may have been risk involved however it was calculated risk; a logical next step.

I surely did not follow Moe Keller's lead and gage what I was taking on before diving into this project.  I did not put thought into what 500 conversations actually meant; what it entailed.  I just jumped in head over heals with no game plan.  Don't get me wrong, I would much rather have dived into this project than not dived at all.  I'm proud for actually starting, yet I should have started on a smaller scale; beginning with a goal seemingly more attainable.  As I continued with this project, the thought of 500 conversations became rather daunting.

This leads me to another take away I learned in Conversation #5 with Cozy Friedman, Founder and CEO of Cozy's Cuts for Kids. After opening three kids-only hair salons, she took a step back and reassessed her situation and where she wanted to go.  At that point she decided not to open more salons and instead move forward with a line of kids hair-care products.  She wasn't giving up, she was changing direction based on her current situation and the future she saw for her business.

Now realizing that I took on more than I can handle with this project, I have reassessed my situation.  Based on this reassessment, I am changing my goal from 500 conversations to 125 conversations with women who have found success.  Believe me, 125 is still an undertaking however I feel like 125 is something I can take on, and more importantly, accomplish.  I sure could have used Moe Keller and Cozy's Friedman's advice before I started this project!  :)

Thanks for your continued support as I continue this journey.  Conversation #6 is coming this week so please check back.

And remember— it's ok to reassess your goal and change course, just don't stop moving forward. 

Reassessing is not giving up.

Conversation #5: Turning a "Lightning Bolt Moment" into a Business

“I was in my twenties— without children— when I opened my first Cozy’s Cuts for Kids Hair Salon.  I had no background in the beauty industry; I just thought a kids-only salon was a good idea and couldn’t believe there weren’t already a million in Manhattan.  The day we opened, there was a line around the block.”   —Cozy Friedman, Founder and CEO of Cozy’s Cuts for Kids; MORE magazine, November 2009

Do you dream of owning your own business?  Do you have what it takes to start a business and succeed?  While in New York City recently, I sat down with Cozy Friedman, Founder and CEO of Cozy’s Cuts for Kids.  She took a risk back in 1992 with a vision of opening a kids-only hair salon.  Her risk paid off; big time.

I met Cozy at her salon on 2^nd and 74^th Street— one of three Cozy’s Cuts for Kids in the Manhattan area.  Although I knew the address I wasn’t quite sure where I was heading.  Suddenly I spotted two young mothers pushing strollers and as I looked up I was greeted by a brightly colored sign that read Cozy’s Cuts for Kids. 

When I entered Cozy’s Cuts for Kids, I was immediately struck by the fact that it didn’t appear like a hair salon. Rather, it felt very much like a toy boutique.  There were toys upon toys extending as far as the eye could see; children playing; adults purchasing gifts for young loved-ones.  It wasn’t until I walked to the other side of the salon that I saw where haircuts actually took place.  I wanted to sit down and get my hair cut— it looked like so much fun!  There weren’t normal barber chairs; instead kids sit in a blue Mercedes or a styling Porsche.  And that’s not all— they can play with a toy or watch a DVD while they get their locks cut.  This certainly wasn’t an ordinary hair salon.  It is a kid-friendly environment that children actually look forward to going to.  Imagine that— kids actually looking forward to getting their hair cut!  And that is the genius behind this business model created by Cozy Friedman. 

I was soon greeted by Cozy herself.  She led me over to the kids manicure area where we sat on small, colorful chairs.  I was immediately struck by Cozy’s down-to-earth nature.  Having an entrepreneurial spark inside me, I suddenly found myself wanting to ask all sorts of questions.  Mainly…how did she do it?  How did she turn her vision into a viable, successful business?

The idea for a kids-only hair salon came to Cozy when she was in her early twenties. 

“A friend of mine told me about her cute little nephew's awful haircut experience at an adult salon. He was scared and began to cry and they were politely asked to leave the salon. That was my "Lightning Bolt Moment", says Cozy.

Cozy began researching the industry.  This was in the early 1990’s, before internet so she spent many tireless hours in the New York Public Library.  Cozy was shocked to learn that a kid-friendly salon did not exist.  She realized that she was on to something and she took action.

“I had a good job at the time.  I was making a lot of money in the fashion industry as a Sales Manager for a denim division”, states Cozy. 

But sometimes turning a vision into reality requires a big leap of faith and a lot of risk.  Cozy quit her high-paying, prestigous job in the fashion industry to devote all her time to researching her business idea and immersing herself in the children’s market.  She gave herself four months to open her kid-only hair salon.

“This period was such a surreal time in my life, explains Cozy.  So much of my identity was with the job I left.  At that point, I was just Cozy.  I felt like an imposter.  When I would run into people I knew from my prior career and tell them I was starting my own business, it didn’t seem real.”

During this time, doubt managed to creep in however Cozy pushed it aside and with the support of her mother, brother and now husband, she forged ahead.

With her four month time-frame in play, Cozy continued researching, developed her business plan, and began looking for a location.  At the same time she was immersing herself in the children’s industry.

“I enrolled in barber school and worked part-time in a toy store, indoor playground, and children’s clothing store to learn and understand my market” states Cozy.

Although she knew she was on to something, most people didn’t understand her concept.  At that time, there weren’t many businesses catering to children like we find today.  Cozy found this most apparent when looking for a location for her salon.  This turned into her biggest stumbling block.

“I could not find a landlord that would rent to me.  I was young, I wasn’t married, and I had no retail experience”, states Cozy.  “No one wanted to take a gamble on me”.

But Cozy continued to forge ahead; fine tuning her business plan, working her part-time jobs in the children’s market, and continuing barber school.  Cozy found a real estate broker who believed in her concept and together they searched for retail space.

While continuing to secure a location, Cozy thought that it would make sense to team up with a toy company.  She met with an executive with a major toy company and pitched her idea.  She felt the meeting went well but never followed up.  Looking back, she felt that it was her own insecurity that prevented her from following up.  Instead, she continued down her path of opening Cozy’s Cuts for Kids with no partnership.

It was approaching two years since Cozy quit her job and gave herself four months to open her first salon.  Two years and no salon.  Right about this time, her real estate broker introduced Cozy to the Vice President of real estate for a national chain of maternity stores.  They were looking to rent out some of their space on Madison Avenue and it just so happened that this executive got her idea and gave Cozy a chance.  A retail location on Madison Avenue in Manhattan— it doesn’t get much better than that!

“We were busy from day one” says Cozy.  The opening day we had a line around the block.”

Remember that toy company executive Cozy met with for a potential partnership?  Well he came into the salon during Cozy’s first week in business.  To her surprise, he asked her why she never followed up after their meeting.  He thought she had a wonderful idea.  From that point on, Cozy told herself that she would never let her insecurity get in her way again.

“Never let your own insecurity prevent you from making a move forward” says Cozy.

Cozy’s Cuts for Kids was a huge success.  Two months after opening, it was listed as “Best Kids Hair Salon” by New York Magazine and celebrities like Meg Ryan and Rosie O’Donnell frequented the salon with their children. 

Two years later, Cozy started planning for a second location.  To date, Cozy has three hair salons in the Manhattan area, has published a book Cozy’s Complete Guide to Girls Hair, and wholesales her line of children’s hair care products nationally.  And Cozy’s Cuts for Kids continues to be a hot-spot for celebrities to bring their children.

Cozy’s four-month time frame of opening her first salon turned into two years, however as Cozy says “sometimes things take longer for a reason”.

“If I would have opened my first salon in four months after quitting my job, I would not have graduated from barber school and spent the valuable time I did immersed in the children’s industry says Cozy.  “This time was invaluable.”

Looking back, Cozy says the single most important factor to her success was her business plan.  “It was my road map to getting to where I needed to be” says Cozy.  She followed it strictly for the first five years.

I asked Cozy if there’s a certain motto she follows that has led her to success.  “I am an eternal optimist” says Cozy, “I don’t believe there’s such a thing as no"; and she’s also a big fan of Jack Canfield’s book The Success Principals: How to Get From Where You Are to Where You Want to Be!

Cozy has indeed found success.  But her success does not stop her from wanting to achieve more. 

“There’s always a bigger boat to sail” says Cozy.  As Cozy continues to push forward expanding her children’s hair care line and tackling other business goals, I have no doubt that this eternal optimist will be sailing a bigger boat very soon.

Do you have what it takes to start your own business and succeed?  Cozy reached success by:

·         Risk taking: Cozy quit a secure, high-paying job to focus on her business start-up

·         100% commitment: Cozy devoted her resources, time, and energy to her business vision.  She took on three jobs to understand her market; she spent endless hours researching and creating a business plan, and she went to barber school.

·         Not giving up: Cozy gave herself four months to open her business.  However, that four months turned into two years because she couldn’t find a landlord who would take a chance on her.  She could have easily given up; but she didn’t. 

Are you willing to take a risk, give your vision 100% commitment, and not give up when the going gets tough?  I guess that depends how bad you want it.

How long are you willing to persist toward your goal?

I recently met my mother in New York City.  My mom is an author and she was exhibiting at Book Expo to promote her first adult novel— The Reindeer Keeper, a Christmas story for baby boomers.  Although this is her first novel, she’s also authored and illustrated three children’s picture books and has been published in Chicken Soup for the Soul, McCall’s, Highlights for Children, The Crafts Report, and has written numerous newspaper articles.  By all accounts, she’s a very successful writer.

When I learned my mother’s intention of participating at Book Expo it was just a natural thought that I would join her.  My mom has been writing for as long as I can remember- she’s actually been writing since age 7.  I’ve always felt drawn to her talent and very attuned to her aspirations of making a living from her writing/illustrative talent.  Attending a tradeshow with my mother was nothing new.  I’ve joined my mom several times in the past when she exhibited at the New York Licensing Show— an event where companies seek properties (ie. logos; images) to license for use on products.  For years my mom was focused on licensing her children’s characters to companies.  Every time we attended a show we were certain that that time would be IT.  The time when my mom’s children’s characters would be discovered and she would finally reach her goal of working full time as an author/illustrator.  But it never happened.  Not because my mother isn’t talented; not because her stories aren’t good.  In fact, my mother is a gifted writer and her children’s characters are very sweet and enduring.  However, we have learned over the years that talent and quality does not necessarily equate to success.  Often times that’s not enough.  For the lucky- the famous or shall I even say infamous- it’s easy to write and publish a book.  More often than not they don’t even have to write the book- that’s where ghostwriters come in; and publishing companies are eager to take the book on because they know the books will sell because of the celebrity on the cover. So where does that leave folks who aren’t famous, yet have great talent and a true passion for the written word?  This got me thinking…

There are so many talented and gifted people out there.  Some may aspire to be a famous novelist or singer; others may aspire to create their own business, some may have political aspirations or a desire to earn their Masters or Ph.D.  So why do some people succeed in reaching their goal and others don’t?  I don’t believe it’s for lack of talent; rather I believe it’s due to lack of persistence.  You can have all the talent in the world, yet if you lack the drive and the willingness to push toward your goal, you will not achieve it.

So this brings me back to the New York Book Expo.  As I sat in my mother’s booth, watching my mom interact with fellow authors, librarians, books agents, and publishers, I realized the true grit and determination she possesses.  Her goal has always been to make a living from her writing; yet she’s still not quite there.  So many people would have given up by now.  But not my mom.  I realized at that moment that IT never happened at all those past tradeshows because it wasn’t supposed to happen that way.  By not having her children’s concepts discovered by a major licensing company, it forced my mom to stop writing and illustrating children’s stories and begin to focus on writing for adults— which ultimately is her true strength.  That shift in focus would not have happened if she “made it” long ago.  

Everyone has a path to success.  Some of the lucky achieve success early on, some never stay on their path because they quit after incurring a few bumps in the road, and some like my mother take a longer journey.  In my mom’s case, she is still on her path toward success.  Through re-evaluation, her path took a different direction, yet it did not end.  It continues in a different direction.

I know IT will happen for my mom; the way IT is supposed to.  And IT will happen because she never gave up.

This theme of persistence reminds me of my fifth conversation I had while in New York.  I was lucky enough to spend some time with a very successful entrepreneur who lives in Manhattan.  She had a vision in 1992 and gave herself four months to achieve it.  Well that four months turned into two years— two years of rejections, brick walls, and hard work.  But she did it.  I will post this interview later this week so please check back.

You may be encountering some bumps lately on your path to success; perhaps you've experienced a recent failure, set-back, or rejection.  These come across your path to give you an opportunity to re-evaluate.  They may serve as an opportunity to change direction on your path toward success.  Note: I say re-evaluate; not give up.  Are you willing to persist toward your goal?  Are you willing to change course if needed?  I guess it depends how bad you want to achieve IT. Whatever IT is to you.

Check back later this week for Conversation #5.  Meanwhile I leave you with this:

"Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence.  Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful people with talent.  Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb.  Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts.  Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent.  The slogan 'press on' has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race."
—Wolfgang von Goethe

Conversation #4: An unexpected realization on the path to success

What do you get when you possess confidence, drive, surround yourself with great mentors— oh and not to mention have a degree from The Wharton School of Business mixed with a bit of luck?  SUCCESS

 

I sensed early on in my recent conversation with Ellen Robinson, Principal of The Robinson Group, a business and leadership coaching practice based in Denver, that Ellen meant business.  How else could she have managed to become President of Ascent Sports, owners of the Denver Nuggets and Colorado Avalanche at just 35 years old?  [The Denver Nuggets and Colorado Avalanche are now owned by Kroenke Sports.]

 

What can we learn from Ellen Robinson’s climb to the top?  Lots of things— including something very surprising and refreshing.

 

Growing up middle class, the eldest of two girls, Ellen had a very supporting and normal upbringing.  As luck would have it, she was surrounded by successful professionals within her community very early on.  Exposure to those role models planted the seed for Ellen’s climb to the top; she set her sights high from a young age.  

 

Combining Ellen’s natural drive and ambition with her family’s unwavering support, it was no surprise that she ended up at The Wharton School studying Marketing and Finance. Hard work got her there; but hard work was not enough to land her first job out of college. That took some luck. During Ellen’s senior year, Frito Lay was interviewing graduate students on her campus.  Even though she was an undergrad, she managed to procure a slot on their interview schedule. Subsequently, Ellen landed her first job as Assistant Brand Manager with Frito Lay located in Dallas, Texas.

 

Whether she knew it then or not, Ellen was following some of her own advice she'd given when I asked her what she would tell a young woman interested in moving up the corporate ladder. 

 

 “Get in a position where you can affect the company’s bottom line and develop your leadership skills”, says Ellen. “This could be in such areas as sales or line management”. 

 

 After three years of successfully increasing market share and sales for Frito Lay packaged goods, Ellen felt it was time for a change.  She and her husband relocated to Denver, Colorado— a city she felt better fit her lifestyle.

 

Finding herself in a new city; a new start, Ellen was looking forward to pursuing her entrepreneurial ambitions.  “I’ve always had an entrepreneurial spirit” explains Ellen, “stemming from running lemonade stands as a young girl.”

 

But sometimes even the best plans can be thrown off course unexpectedly.  One of Ellen’s mentors she met while working at Frito Lay reached out to Ellen when he learned she was living in Denver.  He asked her if she was interested in working as the Area Marketing Manager for Pepsi-Cola based out of Denver.  While it was Ellen’s intention to start an entrepreneurial venture, this unexpected opportunity seemed right at the time. She seized the opportunity.  Remember-never burn your bridges from jobs you leave and stay in touch with former colleagues and mentors— you never know what opportunities may arise because of such connections.  Look what doors opened for Ellen by following this rule.  

 

Continuing her self-imposed rule of setting her sights high, Ellen made her ambitions clear at Pepsi-Cola.  She strived to move into other positions requiring increased responsibility and exposure and she was not shy in letting upper management aware of her goals.  Knowing this, I was surprised to learn that at one point in her career with Pepsi-Cola, she actually took a step down by accepting a position with less responsibility while at the same time allowing her more exposure in other key areas of the company.  As part of her strategic master plan of moving up, this move afforded her invaluable experience in the company’s strategy, operation and sales.  Ellen’s luck continued. Six months after that step down, the head of sales left the position allowing Ellen the opportunity to take on additional responsibility.  Unaware of it at the time, her increased responsibility and varied experiences would culminate in both a preparation for a major career transition and a realization that would catch her by surprise.

When the position of General Manager of the Pepsi-Cola Bottling Company in Denver opened, Ellen saw this as her golden opportunity.  The thought of running the third largest bottling operation in the country enticed her.  However, this big step up for Ellen would require bold action.  Instead of backing away from this intimidating opportunity, Ellen seized the moment; making it known she was interested in the position.  Such a bold course of action landed her an interview.  But not just any interview.

Typically, Pepsi-Cola would groom someone for a position of this magnitude; allowing them to get their feet wet before moving them into such a prominent position.  Because of this and Ellen’s young age, she was required to fly to New York to interview with Pepsi Company’s President and CEO.  To Ellen, this was not just an interview— this was her opportunity to meet her “hero” in person.  For years, Ellen had aspired to become just like this woman. 

Ellen walked away from the interview with not only the job but something quite unexpected; the realization that she did not aspire to be like her hero.  While she was still inspired by the woman’s accomplishments and career success, Ellen realized what her hero had given up to get there.  There was no work-life balance; the job was all consuming.  Ellen made a commitment right then and there to consciously weave balance into her career as she continued down her path to success.

Are there other departments or positions within your company that you aspire to?  However they might be a step up— you may feel like you are not completely qualified or lack the experience so you aren’t willing to express interest?  Just think if Ellen didn’t speak out, step up, and take a risk for the position of General Manager.  She may not be where she is today. Don’t let fear hold you back from pushing forward in your career.

Ellen was highly successful in her new position with Pepsi-Cola.  Because of her accomplishments and client contacts made while at Pepsi-Cola, she was approached by the executive team at Ascent Sports, at the time owners of the Denver Nuggets and Colorado Avalanche, for the position of President.  Ellen seized this opportunity.  Her luck had continued.  Do you feel stuck in your current role or company?  Have you lost your enthusiasm you bring to your job?  Now is not the time to put less effort into your job; now is the time to work harder than ever.  Continue with high quality work because this defines your personal brand.  This sets the stage for your next move in your career path.  You never know what opportunities may come along from clients or contacts that you interact with each day and if you’re not putting 100% into your current job and defining your personal brand, these opportunities may pass you by.

After two years spent as President of Ascent sports, Ellen could no longer hold her entrepreneurial spirit back.  From what she learned in the arena of high level sporting events, Ellen developed a software technology geared towards the meetings and events industry.  Unlike lemonade stands this venture was not without risk; this was big time.  Ellen connected with another one of her mentors who knew the venture capitalist arena.  Through his guidance and a lot of networking, Ellen secured $4 million which allowed her to move from business plan to reality.  However, this business start-up failed after three years.  Ellen took it in stride; learning more valuable lessons.

“I did the best I could knowing what I knew at the time” says Ellen.  “I’m proud of myself, never look back, and have no regrets.”

Have you had a recent failure lately?  Maybe something didn’t go as planned?  Do what Ellen did and look at your failure as a learning experience and use what you learned to move forward down your path to success.

Feeling tired and “out of balance”, Ellen took time off to spend with her family and to do some soul searching.  “I took a lot of time thinking about how hard I wanted to work, how long, and in what industry” says Ellen.  “I decided I wanted to help people develop."

Ellen started The Robinson Group— a business and leadership coaching service where she serves as Principal today.  Ellen focuses on helping business executives become more effective in the workplace.  Of course she stresses the importance of work-life balance to her clients—something near and dear to her heart.  By remaining true to herself and taking time to figure out how she wanted to work and live, Ellen truly has found success and happiness.  And of course a little bit of luck along the way helped too.

So what can we learn from Ellen’s climb to the top?

1.      Importance of mentors— looking back at Ellen’s journey, it appears that a mentor was involved at most key turning points in her career path, whether passing a job opportunity her way or assisting with advice and guidance.  If you don’t have mentors, start reaching out.

2.      Risk taking— Ellen was not afraid to step out of her comfort zone in order to move up in her career and ultimately change careers.  Are you willing to take a risk?

3.      Strategic thinking— sometimes a career path unfolds naturally and sometimes it takes some strategic thinking and soul searching.  If you are on a career path, decide where you see yourself in the future and map out a course of action to get there.  Don’t have a career path?  Return to #1— get a mentor to help guide you.

Surround yourself with people who support you

As you may have noticed I've been slacking off in the post department lately.  I went through a time last month where I lost all confidence and enthusiasm for this project.  However I still managed to muster enough energy to push on with my third conversation— and I'm so glad I did.  I discovered something unexpected and something very important.  [If you missed Conversation #3 with Celia Slater, Executive Director, NCAA Women Coaches Academy check out my April 25 post].

I had never met Celia before.  She didn't know me.  We were introduced via email by a colleague of mine who used to work with Celia when she was head women’s basketball coach at Lynn University.  So when I spoke to this "complete stranger" over the phone I was taken aback by her interest in my project [quite honestly she had more interest in my project at that time than I did].  She thought it was a wonderful endeavor and was excited and honored to take part.  [Honored?  I was the one that was honored that she wanted to participate].  Not only did her personal story inspire me; she encouraged me to continue down this path of “conversations”.  After we spoke, I found a renewed energy for this project and more importantly discovered something that gave me chills and stirred my soul.

A few weeks before my conversation with Celia, I received a phone call from an old high school friend. It was completely out of the blue; I hadn’t talked to her in nearly five years however we’ve always seemed to be able to pick up just where we left off and this time was no exception.  I was glad she called and was looking forward to catching up.   I was excited to fill her in on this project, my “vision” of myself as I approach the next phase of my life and how my project ties into my metamorphosis.  [My biggest goal on this journey of conversations is that I finish what I started and hopefully discover a few things about myself; and of course I hope to motivate you to continue to move forward down your path toward success].

As our conversation unfolded a strange thing happened.  I found myself hesitant to tell my longtime friend the vision I have created for myself.  I felt awkward making this “declaration” to my friend whom I’ve known for over 25 years.  Why can’t I get my words out?  I’ve declared my vision to others lately with ease and confidence and they don’t even know me as well [I will come back to this thought later].  But I finally did it; I declared my vision— out loud; over the phone.  There was a brief silence and then my friend commented “now what is your purpose in this? Don’t you think you’re better off spending your time and energy elsewhere?  All of a sudden I was back in high school— with my big hair, neon pants and gold, metallic shoes [believe it or not this was actually cool back then]. And for the first time in my life I saw how her words cut me down.   Looking back at our friendship, I never really got her true support on things.  She always found a way to knock me off my pedestal or discourage me from trying something new.  I must have known this on an unconscious level and that’s why I was so hesitant to declare my bold, new vision.  She never truly respected me; she actually never really got me— I always dealt with it because that’s just how it always was.  But at that moment I realized that she will never get me or the person that I’ve become and am striving to be, much less support it.  And now I have the choice to react to this situation differently because I am not who I used to be.  Maybe those “strangers” that I’ve declared my intentions to lately actually know me- the person I have become and am striving to be because there is no past history between us.  They see me for who I am now and that's why it was easier for me to declare my vision to them rather than to my longtime friend.

I couldn’t wait to get off the phone; when I did I found myself crying uncontrollably, reflecting on my life and oddly enough my mother.  In that moment I finally understood what my mom has been experiencing for quite some time now.  My mother is a talented and gifted writer.  Just some of her accomplishments include stories published in Chicken Soup for the Soul, Highlights for Children, McCalls, and The Crafts Report in addition to authoring/illustrating three published children’s books and an adult novel.  However her sister never asks about her writing; never expresses an interest in her stories.  She never congratulates or encourages my mom.  To her, my mother is just “Porky” [her childhood nickname].  My mother is just her sister and that’s all she will ever be to her.  She doesn’t see my mother for the author she is today; for the person she has become. 

So what do you do when your friends don’t encourage you?  When they don’t jive with your vision anymore?  When they don’t know you anymore?  Some friends come into your life at certain times and for certain reasons.  However as you grow and change sometimes that friendship doesn’t serve its purpose anymore.  You may find that your “friend” is no longer supporting your new vision of you, or the new goals you are trying to achieve, or the person you’ve become.  Maybe they’re not supporting the new you anymore because they only see the older version of you; maybe they’re not supportive because it will force them to take a look at themselves and their ways of doing things.  Whatever the reason, you have to decide if that friendship is working for you now.  It might be time to cut the cord with some friendships that have become toxic; or it might take you accepting the fact that you are not going to receive support from that friend as you become the new you. You can still be friends but your relationship won't be like the past.

When it comes to family it’s a bit more complicated, however it boils down to the fact that you have to envision the person you want to become and you must surround yourself with those friends and family members who see you for who you truly are and aspire to be.  And you also may find support from unexpected sources— from people that you don’t know very well.  However these acquaintances see and know the real you because they are not constrained by your past.  This support might come from members of a club you recently joined, from complete strangers who have been reading your blog and actually post a comment; or from someone you met in a class that you just started.

Visualize who and what you want to be and surround yourself with those who see you in that role.  Don’t let an old friend or family member steer you off course just because they only see you for who you were. 

You owe it to yourself to become the person you were meant to be.

I've picked myself back up from my phone conversation with my "friend", dusted myself off, and I'm back on track thanks to the encouragement I continue to receive from those like Celia Slater.  Hang in there with me...I have more conversations in the works.  This journey is a learning process— I'm discovering that these conversations take more back and forth than expected and I want to give my interviews the time and respect they deserve and in turn offer some great content for you.  I appreciate your patience as I discover the "art of journalism".  More conversations to come!